Dejan Stankovic scores a nice goal in the 43rd minute and Inter is up 2-0.  AC Milan is heading for a deflating loss here.  Ronaldino has been a non-entity, he could be the key to unleash Pato.

Adriano scores a questionable goal off his arm in the 29th minute.  AC Milan has been the better attacking team, but young Pato has had finishing problems.  The game is far from over, but 1-0 scores are a specialty of a Mourhino team.  Kinda of rooting for AC Milan, it’s Maldini’s last derby.

To all the Paul Inces, Tony Adamses, and Roy Keanes of the world,

Some of you guys have had a rough few months.  Once none of you could do wrong as managers.  Fans loved you, and many a pundit had hailed you as the second coming of Alf Ramsey and Patton all rolled into one media savy package.  Chairmen of clubs saw you as saviors in the uncompromising world of club football.  Then the losses began to mount, the locker room revolted, and the money men began to fear the loss of revenue with relegation.  Tough world trying to manage in the fishbowl that is the EPL, hell World Cup managers managers are getting the ax, and even back to back titles couldn’t save Mourhino.  Tough nut to crack and Christ there has to be a better way to make a few quid.  

I know all of you will find jobs, probably in the Championship or maybe even a lower division.  Even the great Brian Clough had to go to a lower division.  Or one of you can carry on the great English tradition of going overseas and teaching the world the nuances of the game.  In the history of every great football nation is an Englishman.  Argentina, Italy, Germany, et al. all were introduced to the game by Englishmen and taught how to improve their respective talents.  And one nation that could use a Paul Ince or a Roy Keane is the US.  Did any of you see US vs Mexico?  There’s talent on these shores, and I’m not knocking American born managers in the MLS, but none of them have the pedigree and history of being winners in some of the toughest leagues in the world.  None of them have played in the EPL, nor Serie A.  For a league that is desperate for world credibility, MLS doesn’t need a star player signing, but a star manager signing.  The league needs managers who know how a Manchester United develops players, how an Inter Milan trains, and how big clubs in Europe go about being big clubs.  Now you may think why would I go manage in what is basically the sticks of the footballing world?  Well you’ll have owners who could care less if you don’t win immediately, journalists who won’t question every single decisions you make, players who have egos the size of Toyota Prius, and one of the world’s largest talent pools in terms of just pure athletes.  In essence I’m saying be a huge fish in a small pond for a few years.  Sign a 3 or 4 year contract build a strong base for a team in the states, find out what works and what doesn’t, then move on.  Everyone of you wants to manage in the big leagues, but getting there may mean managing at a lower level.  And in terms of lower leagues I think MLS is the best of the bunch.  So think on this, the States man, only one man has ever come close to selling this game here and his name was Pele.  Could a Roy Keane finish what Pele started?  I think so, and you could rehabilitate your resume.  And don’t think by just managing here you’ll be forgotten by Europe.  The list of European clubs with joint venture programs with MLS teams are growing each year, so if you create a splash here it will get noticed.  So sleep on it, talk to the missus, discuss, mull it over and remember the words of one of this country’s greatest personalities “…if I can make it here, I can make it anywhere…”.

Here’s the trailer for an upcoming movie about Brian Clough’s tumultuous 44 days as manager of Leeds United.  In the mythology of English football, Clough is Odysseus who never found his way back home.  Part Flying Dutchman and Wandering Jew, he always produced success wherever he went except at Leeds.  Which is why I’m desperate to see this film.  Unfortunately living in the US my best chance is probably on DVD.The Damned United

I want to set the record very straight here, no amend that, I want my view set in stone without a trace of vacillation.  Major League Soccer does not need David Beckham.  In much bolder type, MAJOR LEAGUE SOCCER DOES NOT NEED DAVID BECKHAM.  His failure to settle in or adjust to life in the US is the BEST thing to happen to the future of soccer on these shores.  My singular problem with the signing of Beckham is he would never have fulfilled the goal of elevating soccer’s status in this country.  His best days are behind him, his talents would have only waned, and his presence endangered the league into becoming the rest home for former European stars trying to finish out their days with some glory.  I am not trying to write him off, I’m sure he will find some success with AC Milan, but within the context of what MLS is as a sporting entity, and what they must do in order to become a success, Beckham leaving should be a lesson to any MLS club who want to sign any “big name” players in the future.  The NASL tried doing that in the seventies and look what happened to that league.  Some of the biggest names in soccer came to play here like Pele, Beckenbauer, Cruyff, and Best.  Yet many of these big names were past their prime, and the ones who still had something to give left after a season or two.  Dennis Trueat, an England international at the time of his signing with the Cosmos, left after a season knowing that while playing in the US offered him more money, the real center of the footballing world was still in Europe.  MLS does not need to repeat these mistakes.  Before this league starts splashing out the cash on name players, it must first establish itself as being on par with any of the European leagues.  And that goal can only be achieved by a long process that will take years.  Why will it take years?  Because any sport, whether it be cricket or bowling needs homegrown stars to help that sport grow in any nation.  And this country is still a generation away from producing the kind of talent one finds in South America or Europe.

Some teenager scores for Everton in the last minute of extra extra time and Liverpool gets knocked out.  A 119th minute loss.  My liver is prepping for several nights of hard abuse.  Serious lineup issues for the next few weeks, with Steven Gerrard tweaking his hamstring and Lucas Leiva showing he is no clear option.

Time Cahill equalizes for Everton in the 87th minute.  Man U ahead on goal differential with a game in hand.  Keane once again disappears in a major game.  This game will just kill you.

Scoreless at the half between Liverpool and Everton.  Both teams have proved anemic in attack, with Torres hitting the post on a breakaway attack.  Keane seems to have disappeared from the game, with Liverpool failing miserably on maintaining possession within their own half of the pitch.  Very contested match, and if Everton does score it wouldn’t surprise me if Tim Cahill is the man for the Toffees.  Control of the midfield is slowly turning into a Kurskian battlefield, someone will get a red card before this is over.  Secretly hoping that Keane scores or the papers will create an issue.

Just minutes away from Liverpool and Everton at Anfield.  Liverpool need to win to regain the top spot in the EPL from those bastards from man u.  Everton, well this is a derby so winning is a must regardless of their position in the league.  This is one of the top five inter-city rivalries in football, so expect a tough contentious match.  Keane and Torres are both playing so this could be a clear indication whether the Keane experiment can work.

So it seems I may have about a baker’s dozen worth of eggs on my face.  Reports coming out of both England and Milan strongly hint that Kaka may soon pack his bags and make the biggest transfer in the history of the sport.  For a transfer fee of $197 million dollars the man who only yesterday claimed he wanted to grow old with Milan now finds himself inching closer to Man City.  The cynic in me should have realized Kaka’s earlier statement, whether meant sincerely or not, is an untenable stance in the modern game.  Despite a world wide recession, Man City definitely has the pockets to dole out the mega transfer fees that would bankrupt most third world countries.  Questions will rise in the wake of this episode whether any player is worth the amounts in question, but that debate will occur later.  As of now this possible transfer underscores that any player has a price.  We shouldn’t be surprised by this, but every now and then all fans of any sport secretly pray for a situation where one player refuses the big money trade and/or transfer.  Kaka’s earlier statement hinted that that rarity was unfolding in Milan.  I should have known better.

There are times when the human condition rises to the challenges the universe throws at our weak and meager species.  Instances where words as “integrity” and “honour” recapture their old luster of meaning and depth.  Today was one of those rare instances.  Kaka, arguably, one of the top 3 players in the world today rejected a move to Manchester City scuttling a 100 million pound transfer deal, and in effect a yearly salary of 13 million pounds.  Christ what balls.  As a cynical bastard of the old school, I find this development more shocking than finding Elle McPherson nude in my bed and conscious all at once.  In many sport related arguments I have had in the past I defended and espoused any athlete’s move from one club to another if the price was right.  In a free open market, the skills any one individual possesses can and should be sold to the highest bidder.  But with Kaka’s resounding statement today, the sporting world in general is afforded a moment where we can unequivocally say innocence still lives in the modern game.  If this move had occured it would have dwarfed the 48 million pound move of Zidane.  Kaka would have rocketed to pro basketball and F1 star status in terms of yearly wages.  What balls.

So the emissary of Hell and all that is unholy won FIFA’s player of the year.  Yeah ok, good one.  He also survived a car crash.  Sure why not.  In other words the universe is telling me I can’t even buy one in this day and age.  Yes he is a great player with skills probably not seen since Cruyff or Curly Howard.  His first touch is sublime, his runs possess all the urgency of a panzer division on the first of September,  and has a cannon shot from pretty much anywhere near someone wearing gloves.  He can be fluid in attack, with a singularity of purpose very similar to Zidane (yes I said it and I stand by it).  So why do I hate him so?  Can it be the colors he wears?  No for I still hold Cantona in high esteem.  Is it the smugness?  Hell I was raised in the US, I’ve known nothing but smug athletes.  Is it the unflinching desire to succede without regard to the tenets of decency as evidenced by his treatment of Rooney at the World Cup?  Hardly, I was raised by immigrant Koreans, success and decency are mutually exclusive concepts.  So why the contempt, the abject loathing of this refuse from the bowels of humanity?  And I’m not alone in this.  On Fox’s Phone In show of January 12th the phone in poll was Ronaldo, love him or hate him.  A number of haters turned out to be Man U fans.  So this visceral antagonism isn’t reserved to just Liverpool fans.  In short with any great sport there must be villians.  And the great villians, the ones that stand out and polorizes the entire audience are excactly the Christiano Ronaldos of the world.  He is sadly and triumphantly our Iago, not an anti-hero, but our Iago.  Without him who do despise and admire all at once. 

And for the record, Fernando Torres is Waaaayyyyyyyyyyyy hotter than CR.  Take that Daniel.

I’m starting to wonder if it’s the drugs, the alcohol, and/or the insomnia that has put me right square in the middle of the most eratic sleeping schedule in recorded history.  Am I getting 6 hours of sleep or 9, did I go to bed at 4 in the afternoon or was it 11 at night that I finally went to bed, and what business do I have in ordering 6 gallons of Yak semen over the internet from someone named Sven.  And by God was it necessary to ship over night by Yemeni Air, what disreputable avenues of international commerce have I sunk to. 

The only benefit of my latest binge into post modernist decadence is my internal clock has become totally in tune with European timetables.  In other words I’m up when kickoffs occur in England.  With the added bonus of having every channel showing live coverage of the EPL, I’m wired right into the fishbowl that is English football.  I was right there in front of the TV when Benitez sent his MIRVs right into Fergie’s airspace.  Christ, I thought, all the hacks on Fleet Street will be dinning out on this till Prince Harry is outed as Adolf Eichmann’s spiritual heir.  What balls to take on such a sacred cow as Sir Alex himself, knighted by the queen herself, the one man who sits literally on the right side of God himself.  The Bishop of Canterbury doesn’t hold the kind of pull that Sir Alex has in England.  So what was the Spaniard thinking, is there some sublime stratagem at work here, have machinations been put into play behind the scenes at 10 Downing and the FA?  Was the Benitez “rant” the opening move in a series of feints and counter-feints that will eventually result in the overthrow of the crowned heads of Europe, the demise of the EU, UAE, CDC, the British pound, GRU, DGSE, ISI, SARS, the National Reconnaissance Office, and the Disney Corporation?  Christ who’ll protect the children!!

Then the drugs wore off, the alcohol slowly began to seep from my cerebral cortex, and I managed a series of cat naps.  Benitez basically told Sir Alex to wank off and due to the nature of the British press all Hell had broken loose.  Where in a normal civilized society this story would have only garnered a passing mention, every douche in the footballing world with access to a computer has prophetsized an event comprable to the annexation of Schleswig-Holstein by Germany under Otto Von Bismarck.  So what have I learned from this?  Only a fool would attempt to follow the EPL on a drug and alcohol fueled orgy of informational overload.  Christ what’s this receipt for 90 pounds of Soviet era solid state fuel?

Just coming in over the wire services, Steven Gerrard arrested in a pub brawl.  Supposedly Stevie G was out celebrating the 5-1 thrashing of Newcastle United and one thing led to another.  Just when I couldn’t hate life more than I thought possible, the universe serves up one more nightmare.  In related news Google reports the number of insensitive scouser jokes one the web increases tenfold.

There are defining moments in any season which either propels a team to a championship or sends into the depths of heartbreak.  With almost half of the season gone in the EPL such moments will occur for every team from Liverpool to WBA.  Today’s match between Man Ure and Sunderland may well have been one of the first of the season so far.  Roy Keane walks out on Sunderland and Man Ure must keep up with Liverpool and Chelsea as the midway point approaches.  For Sunderland to walk away from this with any points would have been a major step into salvaging this season.  The heartbreaking winner in injury time by Vidic may have sealed Sunderland’s fate into relegation.  Such is the pain that lurks for every team once teams reach this phase of the season.

Just picked up a book in paperback called Bloody Confused.  It chronicles the experience of an American journalist moving to England and immersing himself in the football culture of the Home Isles.  Very funny writiing, but more importantly shows the cultural confusion of trying to adapt to an entirely different sporting world.  Sure you want to converse with your neighbors at the match, but maybe that is just not done over there.  What do you mean I can’t buy a ticket even though the game isn’t sold out.  These are some of the nuances of becoming a fan of the game in England and navigating such pitfalls lends the book an innocence I haven’t felt at a sporting event since my first foray into point shaving. 

Yet the greatest joy within the book is watching a burgeoning fan attach himself to a team.  Read it and it feels like reliving your first sexual encounter with a non-family member.

So Bill Buford, in the “Sunderland” chapter.  I just love the short hand reference, keeps the unwashed out.   Fine elitist and fatuous so I’ll begin again.  In Bill Buford’s illuminating paen to English football and hooliganism, there is a chapter devoted to Buford’s interaction with one Superintendent R. McAllister.  In short the police official queries said American one the crowd conditions at U.S. sporting events where upwards of 90,000 fans are crammed into an enclosed space for upwards of three hours with no fatalities due to crowd violence, nor congestion.  Now Buford is not trying to claim the Taylor report as his own, rather that crowd control at U.S. events may have been slightly ahead of its English counterparts. 

Fast forward to today and reports are coming out of England’s Championship division of a call for a salary cap.  For anyone familar with Soccerati, a call for a salary cap was put forth some months ago.  In a trickle down gestalt of footballing economics, this credit crunch is affecting every aspect of the world economy and sport leagues are not immune.  Numerous chairmen and officials of Championship side teams are concerned that current and near future revenue streams will not keep pace with the transfer standards set in past years.  In other words the players Southampton could afford say three or two years ago may no longer be realilstic come this January or summer.  Already major clubs such as Man Ure and Chelsea have given signs that they will not pursue large purchases when the transfer window opens.  So maybe a salary cap, something U.S. leagues have all to some degree instituted, is the necessary tonic for current economic conditions.  Not as a short term panacea, but as built in mechanism to protect the leagues, from EPL to conference, from rampant fiscal meltdown.

Liverpool moves into first today by drawing with West Ham at Anfield.  Notice the disturbing aspect of the previous sentence.  Nothing about our performance today suggests a strong and sustained challenge for the EPL championship.  While no one in the top six delivered a stunning performance over the weekend, has anyone reached the top spot with such an anemic showing.  We bitch and moan about left and right back issues, width, and now scoring issues once again rear its’ ugly head.  Yes I’ll quietly celebrate being alone at the top of the table, but at the same time I’m stocking up on booze and oxycontin for the coming storm.

The first one says… well you know how these jokes go.  It all ends up with a polar bear saying “But I didn’t eat her.”.  However what isn’t a joke is how the MLS championship game played out( cheap and gratuitous intro I know, but we are in a recession so cheap is a good deal here).  One of the key pharses I picked up on during the broadcast was the description of Columbus’ play as “workmanlike”.  Yes quite possibly the most common back handed compliment on the planet.  Why would any sport team want to walk away from a match with the tag of “workmanlike”?  Yet maybe this is the identity the MLS is slowly but surely craving out for itself.  The Bojan Krikics, and Patos of this world are not ringing up their agents demanding a move to Columbus or Salt Lake City.  And the youth development system in this country are I believe a generation away from producing a steady stream of world class players.  So until then what realistic identity but workmanlike can this league have.  A sure imperative for football’s success not just in this country but within the world landscape is for the MLS to have a style of play that is easily identifiable.  Now workmanlike may not sound as sexy as the plethora of cliched adjectives that are heaped upon European and South American leagues ad nauseum, but workmanlike is something MLS can build upon.  Soon the league will expand into two more cities, growth for the leaue is steady.  The next step will be to focus on the international club competitions.  The Concacaf Champions tournement is definitely where coaches, league officals, and players must look to excel.  Joining the ranks of La Liga, the EPL, and Serie A is a long and slow process, but one which looks promising.

Strike the struggling comments from the last post.  Norwich just had a man sent off in the 20th minute.  So want Forrest to close it out.  The average age of the Forrest team is 22.  Christ Norwich just scored a man down.  Jesus this game will just kill you, fucking kill you.  Never ever let your children become fans and if for some reason you do let them become fans, know that you have doomed them to years of mental health issues.  Slightly odd to hear Martin Tyler call the game.